3:08 am - Tue, Aug 19, 2014
Q: I have a question on trying to get diagnosed... Should you tell your actual doctor that you think you might have DID or should you just go and look for a Psychiatrist? I don't know what steps to take. Please help me..
Anonymous

It might depend on what country you live in. I’ve heard of others telling their actual doctor, but where I live (in the US), you would want to work with a therapist or ask your therapist for a recommendation to a diagnostician. It all depends on what options are available to you in terms of money and location. I personally was recommended by my therapist to a diagnostician, but I live on the outskirts of a fairly large city and had no trouble finding someone who could see me without me having to go too far out of my way for the appointment. I know that not everyone is that lucky! If you don’t have that choice and you do live in the US, I would still recommend getting a therapist who has experience working with dissociative patients.

Can our followers add anything to this?

-Rage of Those Interrupted

2:45 am
1 note
Q: So like I'm kinda new to all of this *sweeping hand motion* and I'm tryin to find out shit abt myself and everything. I talk to myself (I think?) a lot inside my head and I think I'm in control of what I'm saying (I dunno) but sometimes I'll have arguments or I'll be doing something that I don't want to do and I'll tell myself to stop and reply that I cant!!!! bc I have compulsions and shit. I usually hear the same voice, but sometimes it's different. However, my voice outside changes a lot, too
Anonymous

(2/2) Sometimes I take on a new accent in my head, but it’s triggered by hearing it elsewhere usually. I don’t really have any gaps of memory I don’t think. Is this something that everyone does or is this an atypical thing?

(3/2) ok I lied a little bit (by accident) — I have gaps in memory occasionally, but I never really thought anything of it. Like I would fall asleep in my bed and wake up in my parents’ bed (and I slept on the top bunk of a bunkbed). Sometimes people talk about conversations that we had or little things I did and I don’t remember, but I don’t think it’s

(4/2) atypical??? I think that happens to everyone?? I know sometimes my typing style/speaking style/writing style changes or my handwriting is different, but I’m aware of it at the time. Idk

Please keep in mind that we’re not capable of diagnosing anyone through this blog. Even if we were all licensed diagnosticians, it’s impossible to get a good feel for someone’s situation through a couple of asks. If you want to know for sure whether or not you have a dissociative disorder, you should mention the possibility to your therapist or go through the formal diagnostic process. What you shared above doesn’t give us enough information and could neither confirm nor deny the presence of a dissociative disorder. That said, if what you shared is a majority of the things that you could share in relation to dissociative symptoms, I would think that it’s unlikely that you have DID or even DDNOS.

It’s normal for people to talk to or even argue with themselves, and impulse control disorders can easily lead one to feel as if their body is out of their control. What could indicate the presence of an alter would be one’s body being moved in ways that didn’t relate to any compulsions but instead involved engaging in actions that might range from perfectly normal to something that the person would normally never do. If you behave highly uncharacteristically or seem to hold opposing views during the times when you feel out of control, that might indicate some degree of dissociation or identity confusion. Otherwise, it might indicate some degree of depersonalization, but it wouldn’t mean that you have DID. Some people with DDNOS don’t experience their alters as actually taking control of their body, but the sensation of being compelled to act for an alter should still feel different from a compulsion.

As well, many people experience some kind of an inner voice that they don’t always view as their own. Writers are especially prone to this, and it’s not uncommon for an inner voice to take on a different accent or tone, especially in regards to something heard elsewhere. Again, for this to be a sign of DID or DDNOS, the inner presence would tend to be consistent as it corresponded with each alter. Each would have their own accent (if applicable) and their own way of presenting and using the body. They would be discernibly different from you in terms of more than just having a different mental sound. Even the most loosely differentiated systems are more defined than existing in the form of one fluid inner voice.

Everyone can be a bit forgetful sometimes, and I can’t tell you to what extent your memory is normal or abnormal. Memory loss can be hard to pinpoint and judge even for those with DID! Again, however, an important distinction would be your behavior in those times that you can’t remember. If your friends report you acting in ways that you can’t imagine having acted, that might indicate the activities of an alter. On the other hand, if your friends offhandedly mention something that you feel you easily might have done and forgotten, a lapse in memory is a reasonable thing to assume. What you do when changing beds could be due to sleep walking or doing so while only half awake and so being more prone to forgetting the experience in the morning. Unless you’re experiencing frequent memory gaps, forgetting important personal information that you should have easily known, or finding evidence of taking actions that you have no recollection of doing, it might not be worth worrying about.

Again, based on the information that you gave us, I can’t say that you don’t have DID. You could, and I would never know the difference! However, what you said in the above messages doesn’t indicate to me that you have DID. Even DDNOS-1 requires more separation of the self than you seemed to be reporting. However, if you want a second, more relevant opinion, I recommend seeking the advice of a therapist or diagnostician who’s trained to recognize the disorder.

I hope that this helps!

-Rage of Those Interrupted

12:30 pm - Sun, Aug 17, 2014
19 notes

birthplaceofstars:

I’m doing the local Color me Rad run and I’d like to raise some money for FPP.

If you can donate, please do, especially as 100% of the funds go to FPP.

If you can’t, please signal boost?

Thanks guys.

Just signal boosting this here.

12:30 pm - Fri, Aug 15, 2014
16 notes
[Image: 12-piece background, alternating between blue & orange with a picture of a young degu in the middle. Top text reads: “DID I FALL ASLEEP AND WAKE UP REALLY SUDDENLY” Bottom text reads: “OR WAS SOMEONE ELSE FRONTING?”]
Some nights I wake up very suddenly in strange positions and I don’t remember falling asleep. I never know if I just fell asleep/woke up suddenly, or if someone else started fronting and just isn’t admitting it.

[Image: 12-piece background, alternating between blue & orange with a picture of a young degu in the middle. Top text reads: “DID I FALL ASLEEP AND WAKE UP REALLY SUDDENLY” Bottom text reads: “OR WAS SOMEONE ELSE FRONTING?”]

Some nights I wake up very suddenly in strange positions and I don’t remember falling asleep. I never know if I just fell asleep/woke up suddenly, or if someone else started fronting and just isn’t admitting it.

5:23 am
11 notes
Q: what does being Switchy feel like? I have DDNOS and I keep having these strange episodes and I wonder if they could be related?
Anonymous

When I’m switchy, I’m dissociated and can sense one or more alter(s) inside that might take over. It may not be that a switch is planned or that anyone particularly wants to switch out so much as that I can’t keep a grasp on front due to dissociation and someone else is better suited to handle whatever triggered the state. However, feeling switchy can last a long time without actually causing a switch, and that can be rather aggravating! On the other hand, it can sometimes lead to rapid cycle switching where multiple alters will switch back and forth in succession. Sometimes, it can be related to or lead to passive influence in which an alter’s feelings, thoughts, or desired actions are transferred to the one at front without the alter actually taking over.

Maybe our followers could share how it feels for them so that you have a broader range of experiences to draw from?

-Rage of Those Interrupted

4:49 am
2 notes
Q: I can't remember almost anything from my childhood and the memories i have are irrelevant but negative in most of the cases, i remember being molested by two different persons a boy who was two years older than me and a girl who was like 5 years older, i have very vivid memories of this but very short i feel like there's so much i can't remember and it's really frustrating for me cause i feel like this could relate with my anorgasmia, i'm seventeen years old i would like some help
Anonymous

I’m sorry you’ve experienced that, Anon. Your best bet would probably be to speak to a therapist, or a professional in that kind of capacity. 

Not being able to remember, or only being able to remember pieces is actually quite common in people who’ve had traumas, and you’re right, it’s incredibly frustrating. At the same time, it’s often done to protect you which is why I recommend a professional. Sometimes, you can end up making yourself a lot worse by digging too much and trying to find out what your brain is hiding without any support or backup.

Good luck, 

Blu

4:42 am
1 note
Q: Ignore all of that, please. Of course what he went through is real. Just pretend you never read it. To get involved could be dangerous.
frakkingtardis

I’m sorry, I’m a little baffled by this message. We don’t have anything else from you in our inbox. Please feel free to send again though if we’ve missed something.

Blu

4:41 am
4 notes
Q: Hey, I just have a question about alters? What are they exactly? And how could one know that they have them? thanks :)
craackabottlee

Alters are dissociated states of ones personality who have developed their own identity. The levels of development can vary from alter to alter as well as from system to system, but alters generally experience themselves as separate from other alters, have their own consciousness, memory, skills, emotions, worldview and view of themselves.

As for knowing whether you have one, there can be many tell-tale signs, from hearing voice in your head separate to your own, or finding things in your possession with no idea of how they got there, to finding your notes in various different handwriting when no other (3D person) could possibly have access, or losing time and finding yourself in places that you have no recollection of travelling to. All this would need to be without the use of drugs or alcohol. For some people though, they don’t actually notice any of these things and only find out after time in therapy.

Blu

12:30 pm - Wed, Aug 13, 2014
33 notes
12:30 pm - Tue, Aug 12, 2014
44 notes
[Image: 12-piece background, alternating between blue & orange with a picture of a young degu in the middle. Top text reads: “NEVER SURE IF YOU SLEEP WALK” Bottom text reads: “OR ALTERS JUST SPEND NIGHT TIME DOING STUFF”]

[Image: 12-piece background, alternating between blue & orange with a picture of a young degu in the middle. Top text reads: “NEVER SURE IF YOU SLEEP WALK” Bottom text reads: “OR ALTERS JUST SPEND NIGHT TIME DOING STUFF”]

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